Another form of maneuvering is to become the guy's "mom." Insecure females all too often deceive themselves into thinking that because they do so much for a particular young man, they will surely win his love. Wrong! It is easy for a man, whether he is young or old, to let a woman sacrifice for him. Why? Most men are used to the sacrifices of a woman. Good ol' mom has been sacrificing for him since the womb. Sure, the young man will say, "Thanks," but young men do not marry their mothers! When a woman does something nice for a certain guy, he usually does not spend the rest of the day thinking about her unselfish service (he may be accustomed to receiving). The woman may begin to feel used.
Some women prepare meals, sew on buttons, and wash the guy's clothes -- all things a mom would do -- assuming all this is practice for their future together. Inevitably, the man she has served so unselfishly may fall for a girl who can't bake or sew and thinks you take all the clothes to the dry cleaners that "fluff and fold."
Most men are used to the sacrifices of a woman.
I don't know if I fully agree with todays devotional. I mean, I absolutely think you shouldn't be doing someones chores for them just to win their affections. When Jackie says the womans service was 'unselfish', I completely disagree. If you are doing things for a man in the hopes that he will love you or date you or reciprocate your feelings, you are being selfish. This is not a case of doing something for someone out of the kindness of your heart.
I have been that selfish, naive woman before. I've done a guys laundry, cleaned his room, made him dinner...all so that maybe, just maybe, he would begin to look at me in a different light. This plan failed miserably. Attraction is not something you can force. Either he likes you for you and wants to be with you or he doesn't. A clean car or a homemade meal isn't going to change that.
If the guy you are spending all this time and energy on isn't taking the time to get to know you or reciprocating your feelings, it's time to take a step back and look at what's really going on. You can force someones feelings. You are only in control of yourself. He may not be the one for you.
Rather than spending all that wasted time and energy on a guy who just simply isn't in to you, why not use that time to glorify God? We are all stewards of our Lord and Savior. If you can take your zeal for cleaning or cooking or sewing or whatever it may be, and help someone who really needs the help -- just because doing so would honor God -- you will be so much more fulfilled. Will you turn your attention from that cute guy to your Savior?
This was really interesting Lauren!
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