Love like You

I was listening to one of my favorite praise songs the other day (Hosanna by Hillsong United) and one line really resonated with me.

'Show me how to love like You have loved me'

I think this is something we all struggle with.  At least, I know I do.  I like to think I'm a 'nice' person.  That I treat everyone equally and fairly.  That I give people the benefit of the doubt.

But I am an imperfect person.

Too often I find myself making snap judgements or gossiping.  I like to justify it by saying I'm just venting or making an observation.  But those are just excuses, justifications.  It doesn't really excuse or justify my behavior.  My friend, Kristi, wrote about just that here.

Sometimes people just rub me the wrong way.  They haven't done anything wrong.  I am in no place to judge anyone else, but I do.  I'll say 'I love so-and-so, but can you believe what they did?' or 'she seems like a nice enough person but did you hear what she just said?'

Who am I to judge anyone?  I have a faulty personality.  I've lied.  I've cheated.  I've stolen.  I've  been mean.  I've been petty.  I've been immoral.  I've sinned countless times.

If only I could learn to love like God loves us.  He loves us unconditionally.  There is NOTHING we can do to alter that love.  No matter how many times we fall short (and we will-again and again and again...), God is there to help us back up, embrace us and say, 'it's okay, my child.  I forgive you.  I love you.  I will never leave you.'.

I want to love live that!  I want to be loved like that.  We are only human though.  We hold grudges.  We make judgements.  We are biased.  This is something I am earnestly working on.  Whenever I hear the venom of gossip flowing from my lips, I have to conciously make the decision to ask God to help me love that person better.

It doesn't matter what that person has done.  It really is none of my concern.  Their struggles are for God to deal with, not me.

Controlling my venomous tongue is difficult.  I will probably struggle with this for the rest of my earthly life, but with Gods help, I can do anything.

What do you struggle with?

LIWD :: day 41 :: Compromise

Marriage to a non-Christian brings pain to the believing wife.  As women, we long to be known and loved for all we are.  A man who is spiritually dead can never know the very intimate spiritual part of you that is your heart. He would be blind to much of what you would try to share with him.  He could never know and understand you fully. 

Be careful when you begin to think that you are "in love" and you "just can't live without him."  Think again.  Think of the loneliness you will feel when your husband will not attend church with you.  Think of the angry bickering that may take place between the two of you because he can never understand the depths of your spiritual awareness and, consequently, your convictions.  If you do not think about this now, you may one day think, "Before I couldn't live without him; now I can hardly live with him."...

Please consider a greater consequence than being unhappily married to a man who does not know your Lord....  Will it be worth the compromise when your children look up at you and ask why daddy doesn't love Jesus?

...you may one day think, " Before I couldn't live without him; now I can hardly live with him."

 I grew up in a home with one parent who was a believer and one who was not.  My father does not understand our faith.  He does not understand our commitment to our churches.  He does not understand our relationships with Christ and why He is so important to us.  He doesn't listen when his wife or children try to explain why we believe what we believe.  He doesn't try to know the Jesus that we know.

In high school, he told my mother I was in a cult...in reality, I was part of a weekly bible study called hi-ba (high school born againers).  The phrase 'born again' scared him.  More recently, he told me Jesus was going to get sick of me because I spend too much time speaking His name and listening to christian music. 

It's hard knowing that my dad isn't going to go to heaven.  It's difficult knowing that my dad isn't open to knowing my Jesus.  It's hard now, but it was incomprehensible when I was growing up.  What do you say when your child asks if daddy's going to heaven?  Do you lie and say yes?  Or do you tell them daddy's going to hell because he hasn't accepted Jesus Christ as his own personal Lord and Savior? 

Why set yourself up for unnecessary hardships?  Don't waste your time dating someone who wouldn't be an ideal mate for you.  High standards are not a bad thing.  Take the time to make a list of the characteristics you want...no, need...in a mate.  Pray over and hold fast to it.  You won't regret it.

LIWD :: day 22 :: Deficit of a Father's Love

Women tend to struggle with insecurity because of the unique way God created them.  God made every little girl with the need to love and be loved by her earthly father.  God designed His world with a picture of a family as the theme.  The father protects, loves, and cares for his wife and their children.  The ideal earthly father models the gentle, nurturing love of the heavenly Father.  Many young women in our society did not have a father who followed God's design.  This God-given need for a father's love caused a deficit in their lives.

...

As a little girl, you may remember feeling the desire to be cherished, loved, and accepted by your daddy.  If he failed to show that love to you in God's way, perhaps you continued to search for a man who would.  No man, not even a husband, can fill the need you have for secure love.  Only Jesus, who "is the same yesterday and today yes and forever," will never disappoint or fail you (Hebrews 13.8).

...the man you marry cannot meet your need for security.  Only God's love brings security.

It's often said that a woman marries her father. Meaning, of course, someone characteristically similar. That's fantastic when your father is loving, kind, respectful, strong, brave, sensitive...etc...but what if your father is mean, angry, abusive, pessimistic, rude...etc.?

If you are a believer, then is God not your Father? Shouldn't you then seek a mate who shines His light? Wouldn't you love to see Jesus in your partners eyes? I pray that he will be able to see Jesus in mine.

While it's great to have someone to share your life with, another human will never complete you. At best, they will compliment you. A man you choose to spend the rest of your days with should be someone who brings out the best in you. For completion, you should be seeking God. A godly man will be able to assist you in seeking God. He should be aiding in your walk...and you in his...but only God should be your all in all.

LIWD :: day 18 :: Hannah More / Do We Really Love God

Hannah More

Born in 1745 in Bristol, England, Hannah More was to become a champion of the disenfranchised of the world.  Instead of quiet domesticity, in obscurity, Hannah blazed a trail for women.  As a powerful writer she earned a fortune which she used to set up a cottage industry that printed millions of moral tracts that were distributed around the world.  She became friends with John Newton, the ex-slave trader, who became her mentor.  She joined in with William Wilberforce in the battle against slave trade.

She has the honor of making English ladies the foremost agent in the education of the poor.  The intensity of her love for the Lord Jesus was reflected in a life given for His people.

What an example of balance: the hearts of Mary and Martha beating within the same bosom.  Hannah More proves that you can be passionate about His presence and at the same time be a servant to fellow man.

Do We Really Love God?

Our love to God arises out of our emptiness; God's love to us out of His fulness.  Our impoverishment draws us to that power which can relieve and to that goodness which can bless us.  His overflowing love delights to make us partakers of the bounties He graciously imparts.  We can only be said to love God when we endeavour to glorify Him, when we desire a participation of His nature, when we study to imitate His perfections. 

We are sometimes inclined to suspect the love of God to us, while we too little suspect our own lack of love to Him.  When the heart is devoted to God, we do not need to be perpetually reminded of our obligations to obey Him.  They present themselves spontaneously and we fulfill them readily.  We think not so much of the service as of the One served.  [The motivation which suggests the work inspires the pleasure.]  The performance is the gratification, and the omission is both a pain to the conscience and wound to the affections....

Though we cannot be always thinking of God, we may be always employed in His service.  There must be intervals of our communion with Him, but there must be not intermission of our attachment to Him.

Our love to God arises out of our emptiness; God's love to us out of His fulness.

There is a certain joy you feel when you do something selfless.  Whether it be donating money to a worthy cause, watching someones kids free of charge, helping someone move, making a meal for someone in need, giving someone a ride...whatever it is that you can do to help lighten someones load.  That warm fuzzy feeling you get from doing something good is like no other.

God has given us all gifts. How selfish is it of us when we hoard these gifts rather than using them to help others and spread His love. What will you do to get the warm fuzzies this week?

LIWD :: day 16 :: Choose: Him or What He Can Give

Many seek God, but only for His hand.  They don't want God as much as they want something from God, such as a man, happiness, or a family.  This impure search for God is limited to what you can get.  It is more of a self-love than a God-love.  This seeking will end in misery, not in the union of love you desire.  God...knows your motives.  To grow in your knowledge of God, you must seek God correctly, which means you must also seek God with a pure heart.

A woman with a pure heart for God does not focus on what He gives, but delights in who He is.  She seeks God's face, not just His hand.  Would you want someone to say he loves you just so you would do something for him?  To find, God, you must seek Him with pure motives.  Seek Him for who He is, not just for what He can do for you....

...

Singleness does not have to be a curse....Singleness puts you in an advantageous position because, more than likely, you have much more time to seek the Lord now than you will ever have if you marry.

...you must seek God correctly, which means you must also seek God with a pure heart.

God loves us.  Period.  No ifs, ands, or buts about it.  He loves us.  There's nothing you can do to make Him love you more.  There's nothing you can do to make Him love you less.  He loves you unconditionally...no matter what.

As humans, we are naturally selfish.  We live in a world of gimme, gimme, gimme.  Most of us have been guilty, at one point or another, of falsely believing that the world revolves around us.  It's natural that everytime we want something, we turn to God.  Please get me out of this situation.  Please let this happen for me.  Please make this happen.  Please give me this.  Please spare me that.  How often are those pleases followed with thank yous.  How often are those pleases followed by an if it is in Your will?  If you are anything like me, not often enough.  The world does not revolve around us.  Everything does not happen to benefit ourselves.  No matter what we do, how much we try to make things happen, God is in control...always was, always is, and always will be. 

He loves us not despite our flaws and not because of our talents.  He loves us because we are His children.  He created us and He just loves us.  As soon as we can realize that we do not deserve any of the things He has chosen to give us and accept the love that He gives us unconditionally, only then can we truly love Him back the way He deserves to be loved.

LIWD :: day 15 :: True Love

Seeking God is very similar to developing a friendship.  You talk a lot, you listen, you write each other letters, you think about each other, you find out what the other likes and does not like, and you try to do things that please that person.  The more you spend time together, the more intimately you know your friend.  And the more intimately you know your friend, the greater your love will be.  It works the same way with your relationship with God.

Jeremiah 29:12-13 promises that a woman who diligently seeks God with all her heart will find Him.  Your heart is the key to devotion to God.  A halfhearted search is not sufficient.  This means you cannot seek God while you do your own thing.

Is God demanding too much to require that you seek Him with all your heart?  No way!...

...giving Christ your heart means you are not free to give it away to other things or people that come into your life (in idolatry)....  Devotion to the Lord Jesus Christ is giving everything or nothing at all.  Your devotion to Christ must be a serious commitment.

Devotion to the Lord Jesus Christ is giving everything or nothing at all.

Who is your best friend?  Someone who works with you?  Someone you went to school with?  A family member?  A neighbor?  Are you closer with them than you are with God?  No matter how well you think your best friend knows you, God knows you better.  I want to know God as well as He knows me.  I want to love God as much as He loves me.  Sounds simple right?  Yeah, not so much.  Just like any human relationship, a bond with God takes time and effort.  He wants to talk with me.  He wants me to share my innermost thoughts with Him -- my hopes, my dreams, my fears, my aspirations.  This relationship is not all about me though.  I need to learn about Him too.  I need to spend time in His word and listen to what He's telling me.

He's not interested in a lack-luster relationship.  He wants all of me.  He wants everything I have to give.  And I want to give it to Him.  I feel it's the least I can do.  He created me.  He created the world around me.  He sacrificed for me.  He forgives me when I don't deserve to be forgiven.  He died for me.  The least I can do is make Him my best friend.

LIWD :: day 14 :: Basilea Schlink / First Love, Divided Love

Basilea Schlink

Basilea (Dr. Klara) Schlink was born in 1904.  Her education included social welfare training and a doctorate in psychology.  She was a leader of the Women's German Student Christian Movement and bravely stood against Nazi policy during the Hitler regime.  She risked her life during World War II, publicly speaking out on the unique destiny of Israel as God's people.  Mother Basilea appeared two different times before the German Gestapo for boldly proclaiming Jesus Christ as Lord; she was released despite her unwavering stance.  As Mother Basilea and another leader, Mother Martyria, led Bible studies (even teaching the Old Testament that was forbidden by the Nazis) for young people, they began to see revival.  The young girls encountered God in a fresh way; His holiness, His justice, His Lordship were experienced anew.  Those who were lukewarm in their Christianity repented; hidden sins were confessed and forgiveness flowed.

First Love, Divided Love

Jesus, who so often says "Whoever loves Me..." and asks "Do you love Me?" is concerned about our LOVE!  He is concerned about a special kind of love.  It is the love which is shadowed in the relationship between a bride and her bridegroom; that is, it is an exclusive love, a love which place the beloved, the bridegroom, above all other loves, in the first place.  As a Bridegroom, Jesus has a claim to "first love".  He who has loved us so much wants to possess us completely, with everything we are and have.  Jesus gave Himself wholly and completely for us.  Now His love is yearning for us to surrender ourselves and everything that we are to Him, so that He can really be out "first love."  so long as our love for Him is a divided love, so long as our heart is bound to family, possessions, or the like, He will not count our love to be genuine.  Divided love is of so little value to Him that He will not enter into a bond of love with such a soul, for this bond presupposes a full mutual love.  Because our love is so precious to Jesus, because he yearns for our love, He waits for our uncompromising commitment.

As a Bridegroom, Jesus has a claim to "first love."

Of course God should come first in our lives...but does it always end up that way? This was also the topic of the sermon at Church at the Bay this past Sunday. Make God your number one, your significant other your number two. It's easy to say that God is number one in our hearts, but does your life reflect that? I know mine often does not. Whether it be because of being 'too busy' or laziness or whatever. Putting God first takes discipline. You have to want Him to be there. You have to work to keep Him there. That doesn't mean that anything else in your life isn't of importance, it just means He is more important. He created you. He gave His life for you. He loves you unconditionally. Can you say all that about anything else?

I'm not sure if this is completely relevant, but it keeps popping in my head. The song None But Jesus by Brooke Fraser has powerful lyrics. They hit me everytime. I pray that they pull at your heart too and that these words are your hearts song.

in the quiet, in the stillness

I know that You are God

in the secret of Your presence

I know there I am restored

when You call, I won't refuse

each new day again I'll choose

there is no one else for me

none but Jesus

crucified to set me free

now I live to bring Him praise

in the chaos, in confusion

I know You're sovereign still

in the moment of my weakness

You give me grace to do Your will

when You call I won't delay

this is my song through all my days

all my delight is in You, Lord

all of my hope, all of my strength

all my delight is in You, Lord forevermore

LIWD :: day 13 :: A Need, A Right, A Completion

Every single woman must at some point come to grips with the fact that not all women will marry.  Marriage is not a need, though God chooses to let marriage meet some needs a woman may have.  Marriage is not a right, though God chooses to plan marriage for the majority of women.  Marriage does not complete a person, though women who properly marry find that marriage rounds out some of their weaknesses.  If marriage were a need, a right, or completion for women, then all godly women would marry.  There are many examples of true, God-honoring women who had no earthly mate but were still Ladies of Patience.

...

Don't let your impatient longings rob you of the life God wants to bless you with as a single.  Realize you do not need marriage for happiness or a full life.  If you are holding onto marriage as a right, relinquish this right so it will not keep you from God's fullest blessings.  God knows what is best for you.  His timing is perfect and He will take care of His Lady of Patience.

If marriage were a need, right, or a completion for women, then all godly women would marry.

I know I've talked of this before, but what a hard pill to swallow.  I pray that I will be blessed with someone to share my life with.  Someone to raise a family with.  What if that's not in my future?  Does that mean I will lead an empty, lonely life?  No, of course not!  I'm surrounded by people who love and care for me.  I am blessed to have made forever friends.  I don't need a man to make me whole.  All I need is my Lord and Savior.  That's not to say I don't want a husband.  It's only to say, I know that I don't need one.  I've lived 27 years without one, I'll continue to thrive if that doesn't happen for me.

LIWD :: day 12 :: Back to the Basics

May we go back to the basics for just a moment?  What is a conviction and how does one develop biblical convictions?  A conviction is a standard that serves as a springboard for your choices.  Consider where your standards, in the area of relating and dating, originated.  Are your standards based more on Hollywood's terms of love and romance, or have you allowed God's Holy Word to shape your perspective?

The Lady of Conviction gives the Lord permission to renew her mind on a daily basis.  She spends time searching the Word of God for standards that will guide her safely to God's best...She has surrendered her mind to a new persuasion:  God's perspective on love and romance.  The convictions that she establishes, based on the Word, allow her to resist being squeezed into the mold of this world.  She is a non-conformist in a biblical sense, as in Romans 12:2 (NIV) which says, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is -- His good, pleasing and perfect will."

The Lady of Conviction gives the Lord permission to renew her mind on a daily basis.

Over the past few years my ideals and convictions have made a major shift. As I've grown in my faith, and grown closer to God, what I want (or thought I wanted) out of life has changed. If I had made a list 5 years ago of what I was looking for in a guy, it would have looked something like this:

• tall
• dark hair
• dark eyes
• olive skin
• slender
• nice smile
• makes me laugh
• outgoing
• not a pushover or a 'yes man'
• good job...or on track to having a good career

Now, while all of those things are nice, they're not essential. My list has greatly changed! Especially since doing the Lady in Waiting study. While that list was more superficial, my wants...needs, really....for a mate are more about him as a person.

• God-fearing 
• serves God before all else 
• involved in a church 
• seeks Gods will in his life 
• wants children...but does not have any yet 
• chivalrous 
• considerate 
• has life goals and actively pursues them 
• makes me smile 
• smiles because of me

Don't get me wrong here...tall, dark and handsome is still a major bonus...just not a necessity. Lucky for me, my boyfriend is tall, dark and handsome...and he loves Jesus.

LIWD :: day 10 :: Become a Princess

When you picture the perfect man for you, what is your prince like?  Do you see a man devoted to God?  A man of character -- teachable, loyal, faithful, gentle, and kind?  What kind of woman do you think this godly man desires to marry -- a shallow woman or a woman full of charm who knows how to dress and capture other men's attention?  Is this the one he imagines he will one day spend the rest of his life with -- the mother of his heirs?  No way!!

To marry a prince, you must first become a princess.  To marry into royalty, you must be appropriately prepared.  Even Diana, the Princess of Wales, had to go through a period of  "waiting and preparing" before marrying Prince Charles.  She had to learn how to properly act, dress, and speak so she would honor the royal family.  Is it any wonder that a heavenly princess must prepare inwardly for the call to which she will give her life?  As you set your attention on developing godly character, Christ will change you into the beautiful princess He created you to be. 

To marry a prince, you must first become a princess.

I know I've been guilty of expecting perfection of others when (clearly) I am far from ideal. I do believe you should have high standards...especially when it comes to who you date and marry. But it's important you keep these standards or qualifications in check. Are you asking more of your potential life mate than you yourself are willing or able to give? Rather than sitting around waiting for God to drop Mr Right onto your front doorstep, why not take this time to expand your mind and your faith? Would you want someone who has done nothing with their life but sit around and wait for your arrival? What would you talk about? Would you be destined to spend the rest of your lives together just sitting around?

Take this time of singleness and use it as the gift from God that it is meant to be. Delve into bible studies. Join a club or two. Read. Volunteer in your community. Become a person you would admire...and, when (if) God deems it time, your godsend will admire you too.

LIWD :: day 9 :: Susanna Wesley / A Life Worthy of Eternity

Susanna Wesley

Susanna (Annesley) Wesley was born on January 20,1669, in London, England and is most know for being the mother of the famous Wesley boys, John and Charles.  Susanna was the youngest of 25 children.  Her father was a minister and often let Susanna take part in theeological discussions with his minister friends.

At the age of 19,  Susanna married 26-year-old Samuel Wesley.  He was a newly ordained Anglican priest who was named rector of the Epworth parish.  During the absence of her husband, Susanna began a Bible study within her home.  Neighbors, family, and friends soon heard of the Bible studies and the crowd soon grew to over 200 hungry souls.

Susanna regularly spent an hour in prayer and Bible reading every day.  This practice was built into the lives of her children and bore fruit in their powerful preaching and passionate prayers.

Susanna passed away on July 25, 1742.

A Life Worthy of Eternity

This life is nothing in comparison of eternity;

so very inconsiderable, and withal so wretched,

that it is not worthwhile to be, if we were to die as the beasts.

What mortal would sustain the pains, the wants, disappointments,

the cares, and thousands of calamities we must often suffer here?  But

when we consider this as a probationary state...and that if we wisely

behave ourselves here, if we purify our souls from all corrupt

and inordinate affections, if we can, by the divine assistance, recover

the image of God (moral goodness), which we lost in Adam, and

attain to a heavenly temper and disposition of mind, full of the

love of God, etc., then we justly think that this life is an effect

of the inconceivable goodness of God towards us...

I have such a vast inexpressible desire of your salvation, and such dreadful apprehensions of your failing in a work of so great importance; and do moreover know by experience how hard a thing it is to be a Christian, that I cannot for fear, I cannot but most earnestly press you and conjure you, over and over again, to give the most earnest heed to what you have already learned, lest at any time you let slip the remembrance of your final happiness, or forget what you have to do in order to attain it.

"...if we can, by the divine assistance, recover the image of God... then we justly think that this life is an effect of the inconceivable goodness of God towards us..."

Susanna Wesleys devotion is to be admired. In a time when women were not preachers or leaders in the community or in the church, she stepped up. She took a great step in faith and began to feed the souls of those around her. How often do I shut my mouth or tuck away my faith because it may be unpopular? I long to shout His praises from the mountain tops, but fear and pride often get in my way. What if they judge me? What if they shun me? What if I sound stupid? What if they ask a question I can't answer?

This is something I've been working on for awhile. It's a slow progression. To be able to speak of my faith freely and not worry what the consequences might be. I know that this is Gods desire. He wants me (and you!) to spread His word! Share the good news! While it may be difficult for me to speak up when it comes to personal matters or when I'm confronted, it could be a vital step in someones salvation. What an honor that is! I pray God will give me the strength to overcome my fears and shout out His praises.

LIWD :: day 8 :: His Script

God providentially directed Ruth to the field of Boaz. you find this divine encounter in the second chapter of Ruth, verse 3: "...and she happened to come to the portion of the field belonging to Boaz...."  The verb happened in Hebrew means "chanced upon."  This leaves no room for manipulation.  She had a chance and her chance transported her into the center of God's will and right to Boaz's field....

If Jesus wants you married, He will orchestrate the encounter.  You have nothing to fear except getting in His way and trying to "write the script" rather than following His.  Jesus does have your best interest at heart.  He desires to bless you by giving you the best.  Sometimes what you perceive as the best is nothing more than a generic version.  consider His wisdom and love in comparison to your own wisdom and self-love.  In whom are you going to trust -- all Wisdom and Everlasting Love or little ol' finite you?  ever since the Garden of Eden, women have often felt they could and should know as much as God.  Much pain in our world has resulted from dependence on our wisdom rather than on our Father's.

You have nothing to fear except getting in His way and trying to "write the script" rather than following His.

Todays devotional reminded me of conversations I had with 2 different friends.  Often during our LIW study (and in several conversations outside of, beforehand), my good friend and spiritual mentor, Desiree, would ask 'if you knew God was bringing you your perfect mate in 4 months (or however long), would you be able to wait?'.  This thought provoked me.  Of course!  I could circle a date on my calendar and count down the days until that season of my life begins!  Wonderful!  Why then...can I not trust in Gods timing?  If I am meant to be married than God will bring us together when we are both ready. 

That brings me to the 2nd friend...Michael and I discuss relationships quite often, and yesterday we broached the subject of the possibility that marriage may not be in Gods plans for one or both of us.  Hard pill to swallow.  I think that I could come to terms with not ever being married...maybe.  But the idea that I might not ever be a mom is devastating to me.  There is nothing I've wanted more...for as long as I can remember.  I've been babysitting since the moment I was allowed...for my younger sister when I was 11 and for other peoples kids when I was 12.  Part of the reason I chose the field I'm in was because of the flexibility I'll have to be at home with my kids and still work.  And since I don't want to have kids out of wedlock...I'm going to need a husband.  All I can do is pray God gives me the patience to wait on His timing and brings me my godsend or that He takes away this great desire I have.  Either way, I have to trust in His will.

LIWD :: day 6 :: Life on Hold

Some singles see the lack of a mate as God denying them something for a more "noble purpose" -- a cross to bear!  Our selfish nature tends to focus on what we do not have rather than on what we do have -- free time -- that can be used for others and ourselves.  Is your life on hold until you have someone to hold?

...Have you experienced...a crushing emotional blow?... Psalm 34.18 says, "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit." [A] brokenhearted woman had put her life on hold after her husband divorced her.  Such a response in understandable, but...this now single woman decided to take her broken heart, her empty arms, and her loneliness and give them to Jesus.  In exchange, Jesus taught her how to resist feeling sorry for herself and how to stop living in the arena of bitterness.  After she made the choice of recklessly abandoning herself to Jesus as Lord, she was free to serve Him.  This once brokenhearted single woman has been transformed into a fearless servant of the Lord....

Have you also put your life on hold?  Do you have an excuse for not serving Jesus?

Is your life on hold until you have someone to hold?

While God may very well be keeping me single for a purpose, I am certain that purpose is not to laze around my house. He may never intend for me to be married, if I don't use this time for a higher purpose I am ignoring His will. I may often forget that the world does not revolve around me, falling into a tailspin of self-pity when things don't go my way. The world is so much bigger than just me. I am such an insignificant part, or at least I am when I'm not doing His will.

While I may not always know exactly where God wants me...or why...I do know He doesn't want me neglecting the needs of others. What gifts do you have? Are you using them to honor God? To spread the good news? You're wasting them if you're not. It's so easy to fall off of Gods path. To take the easy way out. To take a day off from doing His will. But how great is the feeling of fulfilling His will? How accomplished do you feel when you help to bring someone to Christ?

Don't sit around waiting for when (if) God brings you a mate. Take this time to grow in Christ, discover your gifts and use them to spread His love. Putting your life on hold won't make you an ideal mate for anyone else.

LIWD :: day 5 :: Mother Teresa / My True Community

Mother Teresa

She was born Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu in 1910 in Skopje, Yugoslavia (now Macedonia).  In 1928 she decided to become a nun and went to Dublin, Ireland, to join the Sisters of Loreto.  From there she went to the Loreto convent in Darjeeling, India.

In 1929 she began to teach geography at St. Mary's High School for Girls in Calcutta.  In those days the streets of Calcutta were crowded with beggars, lepers, and the homeless.  Unwanted infants were regularly abandoned on the streets or in garbage bins.  In 1946, Mother Teresa felt the need  to abandon her teaching position to care for the needy in the slums of Calcutta.

Initially focusing her efforts on poor children in the streets, Mother Teresa taught them how to read and how to care for themselves.  Many former students of St. Mary's eventually joined her order.  Each girl who joined was required to devote her life to serving the poor without accepting any material reward in return.

My True Community

Keep giving Jesus to your people not by words, but by your example, by your love being in love with Jesus, by radiating His holiness and spreading His fragrance of love everywhere you go.  Just keep the joy of Jesus as your strength.  Be happy and at peace.  Accept whatever He gives -- and give whatever He takes with a big smile.  You belong to Him.

My true community is the poor -- their security is my security, their health is my health.  My home is among the poor, and not only the poor, but the poorest of them: the people no one will go near because they are filthy and suffering from contagious diseases, full of germs and vermin -- infested; the people who can't go to church because they can't go out naked; the people who can no longer eat because they haven't the strength; the people who lie down in the street, knowing they are going to die, while others look away and pass them by; the people no longer cry because their tears have run dry!

The Lord wants me exactly where I am -- He will provide the answers.

Accept whatever He gives -- and give whatever He takes with a big smile.  You belong to Him.

What an amazing woman Mother Teresa was!  To put others before herself at all costs.  I can't imagine.  I often avoid the eyes of the homeless...why should I give away my hard earned money?  There are organizations set up to help them, are they even trying?  Are they even really homeless?  Imagine if the rolls were reversed.  Imagine how blessed you would feel to have someone provide you with a hot meal when you haven't eaten for days.  A cold drink when you've been out in the hot sun for hours with nothing.  Shelter from the rain. 

When you see someone less fortunate than yourself, how do you respond?  Do you turn the other way?  Are you thankful you aren't in their position?  Do you feel superior to them?  Or do you lend a helping hand?  Do you love them the way Jesus loves you?  Or do you deem them unworthy of your time?  I long to love as Jesus loves.  It's hard.  It requires effort and an open heart.  I pray God will grant me that sovereign heart and that I can make a difference too.

LIWD :: day 4 :: Tightly Bound

Ruth came to the God of Israel after years of living in darkness, but He gladly received her service even though she was a Moabite foreigner.  She bound herself to the service of the Lord, interweaving her service with Him like the braiding of a heavy rope.  Isaiah 56.5-7 refers to a foreigner binding himself (or herself) to the Lord and His willingly receiving their "diligent" service: "And foreigners who bind themselves to the Lord to serve Him...these I will bring to My holy mountain...".

Are you tightly bound to the Lord, serving Him diligently, or has your relationship and service been unraveling over the years as you continue to be single and not married?  Has resentment and self-pity unraveled what used to be a tightly woven labor for the Lord?  You must be sensitive to the things and situations that distract you from redeeming your free time.  "Whatever might blur the vision God had given [Elisabeth Elliot] of His work, whatever could distract or decieve or tempt others to seek anything but the Lord Jesus Himself she tried to eliminate."

Are you tightly bound to the Lord, serving Him diligently...?

I would love to say that I always diligently serve the Lord. That I never feel resentment for what I may feel is wrong in my life. But that would be lying. I try to serve the Lord, my God with all my heart, all my soul and all my mind. I desire to do as such, but sometimes I stray. Sometimes the world gets to me. Sometimes satan sneaks his way in. That's why I am so thankful for the awesome support team I have in my life. I have these amazing friends who don't let me pity myself when things don't go my way. Friends who remind me of how sovereign of a God He truly is. Friends who radiate His light when I feel as though I'm in the dark.

The best I can do, is keep Him close to me. By reading my bible daily, praying constantly, surrounding myself with other believers and allowing myself to be vulnerable to Him completely, I can bound myself to the Lord. I just need to remember that Gods plan may not always line up with my own plans, but His are better. I may not understand where He's going with this, but that's okay...He does. Trust in Him and He will lead you.

LIWD :: day 1 :: Fulfillment

Have you assumed that your ultimate fulfillment would be found in marriage? Have you privately entertained the notion that the only satisfied women are married women? Have you been expecting your career to satisfy you until you are married? If you have answered "yes" to any of these questions, then you have a prospect of disillusionment looming in the future. "...A woman becomes a woman when she becomes what God wants her to be." (Kenneth G Smith, Learning to Be a Woman) This priceless truth can help keep your perspective clear in relation to true fulfillment in life. Too many Christian women think that the inner longings of their heart relate only to love, marriage, and motherhood. Chapman one remarked, "I feel very strongly that marriage is not a higher calling than the single state. Happy indeed are those people, married or single, who have discovered that happiness is not found in marriage but in a right relationship with God." Fulfillment for a Christian woman begins with the Lordship of Christ in every area of her life.

Fulfillment for a Christian woman begins with the Lordship of Christ in every area of her life.

Like any young girl, I often dreamt of the day my prince charming would come sweep me off my feet. We'd have a flawless white wedding, have a brood of beautiful children and live happily ever after. As I grew older, I never really let go of those 'goals'. I wanted, make that still want, that perfect guy, perfect wedding and perfect family...but my ideals of what that means has greatly changed. The perfect guy isn't flawless, he is the one God chose for me. The perfect wedding doesn't need to go off without a hitch, simply pledging my love, in front of God and all my friends and families, to my God-send is all I want. The perfect family isn't of the stepford variety, but a family that loves eachother unconditionally and lives for our Savior.

I've grown to know that I don't need those things to be happy. Jesus is my heavenly prince and He can fulfill my heart and my soul in ways that no earthly man ever can. That's not to say I don't yearn for these things. I pray that it is in Gods plan for me to be a wife and mother someday...hopefully sooner rather than later, but I resolve to be patient and wait for His timing.

I struggle daily with becoming who God wants me to be. It's so easy to just lay back and let life pass you by. Bettering yourself, building a strong relationship with God, takes time, commitment, faith and work. I long to be the woman God intends for me to be. I long to radiate Gods light in all of my daily interactions. But, man, it's hard! I struggle with so many things over and over again. All I can do is ask for His forgiveness, pray, read my bible and try again.

While it's difficult to consider the possibility that it just may not be in Gods plan for me to ever be married, it's a pill I have to swallow. I am content in my singleness. I know that God is there for me no matter what. I know that in return for my faithfulness He will have great rewards for me in the next life. I will continue my journey with Him, no matter how difficult, and choose to follow wherever He leads me.

LIW :: 40-day Devotional

In additon to fasting for lent and abstaining from social networking, I will also be doing a 40-day devotional. The devotional comes from the expanded edition of Lady in Waiting. I recently finished the book with an awesome group of women and we wanted to the devotional in the back of the book together. It's a 40-day devotional though and it's a bit of a stretch to extend our bible study for another 40 weeks. So instead, I thought, maybe we could do it individually and email back and forth about it. Then Desiree came up with the idea that I blog about it and everyone else can chime in on the comment portion or on our Lady in Waiting group facebook page (I'd post a link, but that would require me to go on facebook thus breaking my social networking fast in less than 24 hours...so maybe Des or Amy would be so kind to do that in the comments...hint,hint). The timing worked out that lent, which is also forty days (so long as you don't count sundays) fell right around the time I was planning on starting the devotional.

I will be blogging everyday alongside the devotional...they're short so I will include them in 1st half of each blog post so if you don't have the book, you can follow along easily...with the exclusion of Sundays. Please chime in on the comments!

Jesus over facebook

Over the last few weeks, I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out what to give up for lent this year. I usually fast one day a week - this year it'll be sundays because I don't work on sundays and my job is very physical. I want to give up something that will be really difficult.

Last year I gave up chocolate. I missed it, but I found I just ended up replacing it with other sweets. The year before I gave up meat. Now that was hard! I could never be a vegetarian. I considered doing that again this year, but I don't think I can afford forty days worth of balanced, meatless nutrition. I considered alcohol, but I honestly don't drink that much or that often anymore so it really wouldn't be much of a sacrifice. Caffeine was a thought, but I often go weeks at a time without simply because there isn't any in the house.

So I thought, what is something I use frequently that would really be trying for me to give up? Thats when it hit me! Facebook! I am a facebook-aholic. I check my page and my feed at least a dozen times throughout the day. Now this would be something requiring some real effort and will power. I don't want it to be a repeat of last year...replacing it with something similar rather than turning those cravings to God. So I will be void of twitter, myspace, youtube and googlebuzz as well.

How much better will my prayer life be, how much stronger will my relationship with God become, if I take all the time I usually spend on these social networking sites and instead use it to grow in Him?

LIW :: Lady of Devotion

God longs for our devotion.  Not as an afterthought or wherever we can fit Him in (if we can fit Him in) our busy day.  He wants our wholehearted devotion.  He wants to be out all in all.  He deserves to be our all in all.  What's stopping you from giving it to Him?

Is it fear?  Are you afraid that once you let your guard down, you will be left vulnerable?  We are all Gods children.  He is here for us.  He will never leave us.  He loves us, not in spite of our imperfections, but because of who He is.  His love is unfailing, neverending, allencompassing.  He is the only one who can love us as we need to be loved.

Maybe it's your past that gets in your way.  No matter what you've done, where you've gone, how you've you strayed...God will always be there for you.  Come to Him with a grateful heart, ask for his forgiveness (and mean it!) and pledge to do better.  He will forgive you of your misdeeds and give you a clean slate.  Every time.  Jesus already paid our debt on the cross.

Maybe it's your current circumstances.  I don't know where you are in your life, but there is always room for God.  If you're in a dark place, seek Him.  He will shine the light that will lead you out.  Seeking God, devoting your life to Him, may not make you the most popular person around but it will give you a promise of life after death in Heaven with your Heavenly Prince.

Maybe it was your parents faith that is stopping you from seeking God.  Growing up, I had one parent who was a Christ follower and one parent who was agnostic on some days, muslim on others, atheist on still others.  That can be very confusing for a child.  Luckily, my mother held strong to her beliefs and did her best in raising my siblings and me in His light.  We have all been born again and have a thirst for His word.  Maybe you weren't as lucky.  Know that your parents are still human.  They did the best they could, but they're not perfect.  Learn for yourself.  Read His word and decide for yourself.

Your heart is the center of your being.  When you love someone, you are essentially giving them you.  You give your all to a significant other, to a friend, to a child, to a family member...God asks for no less.  He wants all of you...your heart, your soul and you mind.  When you love Him with all your might, only then will you find true love.  Make God an intimate, personal part of yourself.  Let Him eminate your soul.  He loves you as no human will ever be able to.

God is many things.  But He is not capable of doing evil.  He is not supersensitive.  He is not selfish.  He is not temperamental.  He is a sovereign God who loves you no matter what.  He sees all.  He knows your heart and your motives.  It is impossible to hide things from Him.  It is pointless to make excuses to Him.  He'll see right through you.  God is not hard to please.  He created you.  He loves you.  He notices every effort given to please Him and He delights in you. 

Seek God and you will know Him.  Seek God and you will feel His Holy Spirit.  Seek God and accept His forgiveness.  Seek God and accept His love.  Seek God with all you have.  Seek God and listen for His directions.  Seek God by enrapturing yourself in His word.  Seek God by following out His will.  Seek God and let Him in all areas of your life.  Seek God wholeheartedly.

When you give Him all of you, you are not keeping a piece 'just in case' something better comes along.  Devotion to God is an all or nothing deal.  You wouldn't date a guy who was holding out a piece of himself 'just in case' he finds someone better, and God deserves the same respect...if not more.

Seek Him with a clean heart.  Let Him absolve you of your sins.  Ask for His guidance in areas where you are prone to stray from His will.  I have a tendency to gossip.  It takes alot of restraint on my part to hold my tongue.  Without Gods help my tongue would be vicious.  What is your weakness?  Ask God to lend you His strength.

As single women, we have more time than we will ever have again to devote to the Lord.  We determine how deep our relationship with God will be.  So what's more importanto to you?  God or tv/internet/reading/shopping/whatever it is that dominates your time?

LIW :: Lady of Virtue

Virtue can be defined in many ways.  It is moral excellence.  It is righteousness.  It is goodness.  It is purity.  It is patience.  It is kindness.  It is abstinence.  It is wisdom.  It is vigilance.  It is carefulness.  It is thoughtfulness.  It is discretion.  It is everything God longs for us to be. 

Jackie likens our lives, our trials and tribulations, to that of a pearl.  Just as a pearl starts off rough, being sanded, and belted with grains of sand until it becomes a precious jewel, so do we become His precious jewels when we let Him use our life experiences to turn us into such.  Ever heard the saying 'when life hands you lemons, make lemonade'?  As cheesy as it may be, it's great advice.  No one lives a life without any downfalls...without any issues...without any problems.  What's important is how you respond to all of these.  Will you use the burdens in your life to glorify God?  Or will you turn from Him in your time of need?

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

- James 1.2-4

Trials are meant to test your faith and build your character.  That's not to say that God is inflicting pain on all of us.  Pain comes from the free will of others.  It comes from poor decisions we've made in the past.  It comes as a consequence to things that have already be done.  When you turn to God and follow his will, you are allowing Him to use these 'sands' to soften your inner 'pearl'. 

Every decision you make has an impact.  Some bigger than others, but an impact nonetheless.  Will you base your decisions upon the Lord?  Forsaking your will for His?  Or will you be more concerned with the world?  With a quick, easy fix?  Sometimes Gods way isn't the easy or popular way.  It can be hard.  It can take time and effort.  He is the God of all, and He knows better than you ever will.  Trust in Him and let Him make you into the pearl He desires you to be.

When you base your decisions on the Lord, you are not only working on the issue at hand.  You are also working on beautifying yourself on the inside.  Think of all the time you spend on your hair, your make-up, your outward appearance...do you spend even half that time on your inner beauty?  Developing your personality, your mind and your heart is lasting work.  Your outer beauty will fade, no matter how hard you work at it.

What do you look for in a man?  Do you want someone tall, dark and handsome with a nice car and a big house who can afford to take you to fancy dinners and buy you expensive presents?  Or would you prefer someone who has a heart for the Lord, who serves God whole-heartedly, treats others with respect and truly has a passion for life?  While the former does seem tempting...I'd much prefer the latter.  The only way to attract a man of character is to be a woman of virtue.  How can you expect a man of great character to want a woman of shallow worth?  It's what's on the inside that counts.  Pretty people are not the only ones blessed with marriage.  Now this is not to say that you shouldn't take pride in your outward appearance.  You should absolutely seek to look your best...just don't make your beauty your primary worth. 

"Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth in Gods sight."

- 1st Peter 3.4

While your outer beauty fades with the sands of time, your inner beauty will only grow stronger as you continue to nurture it.  You cannot expect to catch a prince when you yourself are not a princess. Develop yourself so that you will be ready to share yourself with your god-sent. A godly man will take notice of a virtuous woman because of her godly character rather than for her flowing locks and sparkling eyes.

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

- Proverbs 31.30

Our personalities are like that of a necklace where each 'bead' or trait is displayed.  Is your necklace full of pearls or of cracked, dirty beads?  No one is perfect, and no one expects us to be, but you can clean these dirty beads, repair the cracked, broken ones, by asking for Gods forgiveness and help.  You must realize that alot of the habitual sins you do or due to underlying cause.  Work to realize that cause and seek Gods help to resove it.

"You're blessed when you're content with just who you are -- no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought."

- Matthew 5.5

God is with us always...it is up to us to decide to walk alongside Him.  When you seek to obey God on a moment to moment basis your are emptying yourself of your sinful ways and filling yourself with His Holy Spirit.  Will you release your sinful ways and allow God to make you into a His precious jewel?  It will most certainly take time and energy, but I strongly believe it will be worth it.