LIWD :: day 1 :: Fulfillment

Have you assumed that your ultimate fulfillment would be found in marriage? Have you privately entertained the notion that the only satisfied women are married women? Have you been expecting your career to satisfy you until you are married? If you have answered "yes" to any of these questions, then you have a prospect of disillusionment looming in the future. "...A woman becomes a woman when she becomes what God wants her to be." (Kenneth G Smith, Learning to Be a Woman) This priceless truth can help keep your perspective clear in relation to true fulfillment in life. Too many Christian women think that the inner longings of their heart relate only to love, marriage, and motherhood. Chapman one remarked, "I feel very strongly that marriage is not a higher calling than the single state. Happy indeed are those people, married or single, who have discovered that happiness is not found in marriage but in a right relationship with God." Fulfillment for a Christian woman begins with the Lordship of Christ in every area of her life.

Fulfillment for a Christian woman begins with the Lordship of Christ in every area of her life.

Like any young girl, I often dreamt of the day my prince charming would come sweep me off my feet. We'd have a flawless white wedding, have a brood of beautiful children and live happily ever after. As I grew older, I never really let go of those 'goals'. I wanted, make that still want, that perfect guy, perfect wedding and perfect family...but my ideals of what that means has greatly changed. The perfect guy isn't flawless, he is the one God chose for me. The perfect wedding doesn't need to go off without a hitch, simply pledging my love, in front of God and all my friends and families, to my God-send is all I want. The perfect family isn't of the stepford variety, but a family that loves eachother unconditionally and lives for our Savior.

I've grown to know that I don't need those things to be happy. Jesus is my heavenly prince and He can fulfill my heart and my soul in ways that no earthly man ever can. That's not to say I don't yearn for these things. I pray that it is in Gods plan for me to be a wife and mother someday...hopefully sooner rather than later, but I resolve to be patient and wait for His timing.

I struggle daily with becoming who God wants me to be. It's so easy to just lay back and let life pass you by. Bettering yourself, building a strong relationship with God, takes time, commitment, faith and work. I long to be the woman God intends for me to be. I long to radiate Gods light in all of my daily interactions. But, man, it's hard! I struggle with so many things over and over again. All I can do is ask for His forgiveness, pray, read my bible and try again.

While it's difficult to consider the possibility that it just may not be in Gods plan for me to ever be married, it's a pill I have to swallow. I am content in my singleness. I know that God is there for me no matter what. I know that in return for my faithfulness He will have great rewards for me in the next life. I will continue my journey with Him, no matter how difficult, and choose to follow wherever He leads me.

LIW :: 40-day Devotional

In additon to fasting for lent and abstaining from social networking, I will also be doing a 40-day devotional. The devotional comes from the expanded edition of Lady in Waiting. I recently finished the book with an awesome group of women and we wanted to the devotional in the back of the book together. It's a 40-day devotional though and it's a bit of a stretch to extend our bible study for another 40 weeks. So instead, I thought, maybe we could do it individually and email back and forth about it. Then Desiree came up with the idea that I blog about it and everyone else can chime in on the comment portion or on our Lady in Waiting group facebook page (I'd post a link, but that would require me to go on facebook thus breaking my social networking fast in less than 24 hours...so maybe Des or Amy would be so kind to do that in the comments...hint,hint). The timing worked out that lent, which is also forty days (so long as you don't count sundays) fell right around the time I was planning on starting the devotional.

I will be blogging everyday alongside the devotional...they're short so I will include them in 1st half of each blog post so if you don't have the book, you can follow along easily...with the exclusion of Sundays. Please chime in on the comments!

Jesus over facebook

Over the last few weeks, I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out what to give up for lent this year. I usually fast one day a week - this year it'll be sundays because I don't work on sundays and my job is very physical. I want to give up something that will be really difficult.

Last year I gave up chocolate. I missed it, but I found I just ended up replacing it with other sweets. The year before I gave up meat. Now that was hard! I could never be a vegetarian. I considered doing that again this year, but I don't think I can afford forty days worth of balanced, meatless nutrition. I considered alcohol, but I honestly don't drink that much or that often anymore so it really wouldn't be much of a sacrifice. Caffeine was a thought, but I often go weeks at a time without simply because there isn't any in the house.

So I thought, what is something I use frequently that would really be trying for me to give up? Thats when it hit me! Facebook! I am a facebook-aholic. I check my page and my feed at least a dozen times throughout the day. Now this would be something requiring some real effort and will power. I don't want it to be a repeat of last year...replacing it with something similar rather than turning those cravings to God. So I will be void of twitter, myspace, youtube and googlebuzz as well.

How much better will my prayer life be, how much stronger will my relationship with God become, if I take all the time I usually spend on these social networking sites and instead use it to grow in Him?

LIW :: Lady of Devotion

God longs for our devotion.  Not as an afterthought or wherever we can fit Him in (if we can fit Him in) our busy day.  He wants our wholehearted devotion.  He wants to be out all in all.  He deserves to be our all in all.  What's stopping you from giving it to Him?

Is it fear?  Are you afraid that once you let your guard down, you will be left vulnerable?  We are all Gods children.  He is here for us.  He will never leave us.  He loves us, not in spite of our imperfections, but because of who He is.  His love is unfailing, neverending, allencompassing.  He is the only one who can love us as we need to be loved.

Maybe it's your past that gets in your way.  No matter what you've done, where you've gone, how you've you strayed...God will always be there for you.  Come to Him with a grateful heart, ask for his forgiveness (and mean it!) and pledge to do better.  He will forgive you of your misdeeds and give you a clean slate.  Every time.  Jesus already paid our debt on the cross.

Maybe it's your current circumstances.  I don't know where you are in your life, but there is always room for God.  If you're in a dark place, seek Him.  He will shine the light that will lead you out.  Seeking God, devoting your life to Him, may not make you the most popular person around but it will give you a promise of life after death in Heaven with your Heavenly Prince.

Maybe it was your parents faith that is stopping you from seeking God.  Growing up, I had one parent who was a Christ follower and one parent who was agnostic on some days, muslim on others, atheist on still others.  That can be very confusing for a child.  Luckily, my mother held strong to her beliefs and did her best in raising my siblings and me in His light.  We have all been born again and have a thirst for His word.  Maybe you weren't as lucky.  Know that your parents are still human.  They did the best they could, but they're not perfect.  Learn for yourself.  Read His word and decide for yourself.

Your heart is the center of your being.  When you love someone, you are essentially giving them you.  You give your all to a significant other, to a friend, to a child, to a family member...God asks for no less.  He wants all of you...your heart, your soul and you mind.  When you love Him with all your might, only then will you find true love.  Make God an intimate, personal part of yourself.  Let Him eminate your soul.  He loves you as no human will ever be able to.

God is many things.  But He is not capable of doing evil.  He is not supersensitive.  He is not selfish.  He is not temperamental.  He is a sovereign God who loves you no matter what.  He sees all.  He knows your heart and your motives.  It is impossible to hide things from Him.  It is pointless to make excuses to Him.  He'll see right through you.  God is not hard to please.  He created you.  He loves you.  He notices every effort given to please Him and He delights in you. 

Seek God and you will know Him.  Seek God and you will feel His Holy Spirit.  Seek God and accept His forgiveness.  Seek God and accept His love.  Seek God with all you have.  Seek God and listen for His directions.  Seek God by enrapturing yourself in His word.  Seek God by following out His will.  Seek God and let Him in all areas of your life.  Seek God wholeheartedly.

When you give Him all of you, you are not keeping a piece 'just in case' something better comes along.  Devotion to God is an all or nothing deal.  You wouldn't date a guy who was holding out a piece of himself 'just in case' he finds someone better, and God deserves the same respect...if not more.

Seek Him with a clean heart.  Let Him absolve you of your sins.  Ask for His guidance in areas where you are prone to stray from His will.  I have a tendency to gossip.  It takes alot of restraint on my part to hold my tongue.  Without Gods help my tongue would be vicious.  What is your weakness?  Ask God to lend you His strength.

As single women, we have more time than we will ever have again to devote to the Lord.  We determine how deep our relationship with God will be.  So what's more importanto to you?  God or tv/internet/reading/shopping/whatever it is that dominates your time?

LIW :: Lady of Virtue

Virtue can be defined in many ways.  It is moral excellence.  It is righteousness.  It is goodness.  It is purity.  It is patience.  It is kindness.  It is abstinence.  It is wisdom.  It is vigilance.  It is carefulness.  It is thoughtfulness.  It is discretion.  It is everything God longs for us to be. 

Jackie likens our lives, our trials and tribulations, to that of a pearl.  Just as a pearl starts off rough, being sanded, and belted with grains of sand until it becomes a precious jewel, so do we become His precious jewels when we let Him use our life experiences to turn us into such.  Ever heard the saying 'when life hands you lemons, make lemonade'?  As cheesy as it may be, it's great advice.  No one lives a life without any downfalls...without any issues...without any problems.  What's important is how you respond to all of these.  Will you use the burdens in your life to glorify God?  Or will you turn from Him in your time of need?

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

- James 1.2-4

Trials are meant to test your faith and build your character.  That's not to say that God is inflicting pain on all of us.  Pain comes from the free will of others.  It comes from poor decisions we've made in the past.  It comes as a consequence to things that have already be done.  When you turn to God and follow his will, you are allowing Him to use these 'sands' to soften your inner 'pearl'. 

Every decision you make has an impact.  Some bigger than others, but an impact nonetheless.  Will you base your decisions upon the Lord?  Forsaking your will for His?  Or will you be more concerned with the world?  With a quick, easy fix?  Sometimes Gods way isn't the easy or popular way.  It can be hard.  It can take time and effort.  He is the God of all, and He knows better than you ever will.  Trust in Him and let Him make you into the pearl He desires you to be.

When you base your decisions on the Lord, you are not only working on the issue at hand.  You are also working on beautifying yourself on the inside.  Think of all the time you spend on your hair, your make-up, your outward appearance...do you spend even half that time on your inner beauty?  Developing your personality, your mind and your heart is lasting work.  Your outer beauty will fade, no matter how hard you work at it.

What do you look for in a man?  Do you want someone tall, dark and handsome with a nice car and a big house who can afford to take you to fancy dinners and buy you expensive presents?  Or would you prefer someone who has a heart for the Lord, who serves God whole-heartedly, treats others with respect and truly has a passion for life?  While the former does seem tempting...I'd much prefer the latter.  The only way to attract a man of character is to be a woman of virtue.  How can you expect a man of great character to want a woman of shallow worth?  It's what's on the inside that counts.  Pretty people are not the only ones blessed with marriage.  Now this is not to say that you shouldn't take pride in your outward appearance.  You should absolutely seek to look your best...just don't make your beauty your primary worth. 

"Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth in Gods sight."

- 1st Peter 3.4

While your outer beauty fades with the sands of time, your inner beauty will only grow stronger as you continue to nurture it.  You cannot expect to catch a prince when you yourself are not a princess. Develop yourself so that you will be ready to share yourself with your god-sent. A godly man will take notice of a virtuous woman because of her godly character rather than for her flowing locks and sparkling eyes.

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

- Proverbs 31.30

Our personalities are like that of a necklace where each 'bead' or trait is displayed.  Is your necklace full of pearls or of cracked, dirty beads?  No one is perfect, and no one expects us to be, but you can clean these dirty beads, repair the cracked, broken ones, by asking for Gods forgiveness and help.  You must realize that alot of the habitual sins you do or due to underlying cause.  Work to realize that cause and seek Gods help to resove it.

"You're blessed when you're content with just who you are -- no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought."

- Matthew 5.5

God is with us always...it is up to us to decide to walk alongside Him.  When you seek to obey God on a moment to moment basis your are emptying yourself of your sinful ways and filling yourself with His Holy Spirit.  Will you release your sinful ways and allow God to make you into a His precious jewel?  It will most certainly take time and energy, but I strongly believe it will be worth it.